Nothing is Clear
by glitterparade84
Summary: Rowan can predict the future, but when one of her premonitions forever changes her future, she must decide how she will deal with the consequences.
1. Prologue

I don't own Thor or the Avengers

Thumbing through the file on his desk, Director Nick Fury of S.H.I.E.L.D was curious. Rowan of Asgard was a goddess he knew little about. Rowan of Asgard was someone he felt he should be wary of.

Director Fury wasn't quite certain how Rowan knew of S.H.I.E.L.D, but he was determined to find out. Her qualifications rivaled those of the entire Avengers team, but looking down at the picture of her in his file, she looked as innocent as can be. As Nick Fury looked down at the picture of the brown haired, green eyed, war goddess, he felt he had no options. Who was he to reject the war goddess. Rowan had come in search of one thing, and that one thing she would be given.

"Rowan of Asgard," he muttered to himself, "welcome to the Avengers Initiative."


	2. Chapter 1

I don't own Thor or the Avengers.

Growing up in the palace is something hard to imagine. My mother, Ingrid, had been friends with Frigga since their childhood years, and once my mother had me, my parents, my sister Sif, and I moved into the palace. Frigga had two sons, Thor and Loki, and I quickly became friends with both of them. While Thor was loud and boisterous, Loki was quiet, subdued, and calculating. My love for battle connected me and my sister to Thor, while my unique magical abilities and quiet tendencies helped me identify with Loki.

Though Loki was far more skilled in the mystical arts than I, we trained, researched, and practiced our magic together. I knew Loki was far more powerful than he would ever let on to anyone other than me, but fear of the unknown was what kept his enemies on edge. I could see the future through my dreams which always helped Asgard in battle. We quickly learned that besides my premonitions, I wasn't good for much more than defensive spells. I was one of the most qualified archers in the kingdom, but luckily where my arrows failed, my magic could compensate.

Thor was determined to better my skill with a blade reasoning that if I could take on hundreds of soldiers with a bow and arrow than I should be able to hold my own with a sword. At first Sif was responsible for my training until Thor discovered that my sister and I were accomplishing a lot that had nothing to do with sword fighting and took over. I remember the day when I was deemed worthy enough to receive my own battle sword. Gleaming metal with a gold hilt that was decorated with Tanzanite gemstones. I could sense the magic that the blade had been blessed with and new immediately that Loki had set up wards of protection on my blade.

A pattern was established very quickly that left me exhausted at the end of each day. In the mornings I was to arise and meet Thor at the training field after breakfast each morning. After sword practice, I was free to spend time practicing my archery and offer help to the training archers. Following lunch everyday I would meet Loki in his private library. Each day we would talk about our mornings and practice our basic skills. Sometimes we would wander the palace playing harmless pranks on the Lords and Ladies of the court. Some days we would research a new aspect of magic we hadn't understood before and begin our attempts at mastering it, or in my case helping Loki master it. After supper was the time when I joined Sif and the Warriors Three in battle training. With scenarios that were setup differently each day, we were able to strengthen our weakest areas to become stronger warriors to protect Asgard.

So this continued on for hundreds of years. Everyday the same routine until one night when I saw the future. I knew from the moment I woke up I knew that everything was going to change, and for the first time in five hundred years, I didn't meet Thor on the training field.


	3. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Thor or The Avengers.

I woke up that morning in a complete state of shock. With no idea what to think, I stood up and walked to the balcony. I had never had a dream about myself before. I'd dreamt of wars and matters of diplomacy, of my mother spilling her wine on her midnight blue dress at last summers ball, and of Thor's drunken tumble down the stairs after a night of celebrating another Asgardian victory, but never had I dreamt of myself.

I shook it off and walked to the bathroom to bathe and prepare for the day. Once I had dried off I changed into my training outfit and walked to breakfast in a daze. Upon arrival, I discovered that I was last to the table and all eyes were on me as I took my seat between Sif and Loki.

" Are you all right, dear? You're not usually so late to breakfast." I heard my mother ask.

" I'm fine, mother. I was just really tired from reading too late. No need to worry." I lied. I could tell that Sif didn't quite believe my lie as easily as mother and of course Loki saw right through it as usual. Thor, picking up on the tension, began to loudly recount some previous battle that he wanted to recant to us all quickly enamoring Sif and giving me a moment to think.

I looked to my left and caught Loki's eye and I knew that he knew I'd had some sort of premonition and that he intended for us to talk about it. I blushed immediately thinking of how I'd have to think of some way to change the subject or divert his interest. I couldn't tell him what I had been dreaming of the night before. The embarrassment alone of knowing the future that was going to come to pass between he and I was enough to make me want to crawl in a dark cave. The horror of what I also knew was going to come to pass frightened me.

The Loki I knew was my best friend and one of the best people I knew. He was mischievous yes, but that didn't make him a bad person. Playing games wasn't wrong. He wasn't always the most honest man, he certainly had a way with words, but what soul has never told a lie? I could tell him anything and he was always honest with me. He loved his brother and had limitless respect for his parents, but at that moment, all I could think was _how could it be that this man could ever love me or ever be capable of such evil? _

"Allfather may I please be excused from the table?" I asked Odin as I stood abruptly.

He looked over at me with his all knowing eyes. " Of course, Rowan. Are you sure everything is all right?"

I didn't hesitate to respond. " I'm fine, I just have a couple of things to take care of. Excuse me."

With that I quickly walked from the hall and straight to the archery fields. I knew Thor would come looking for me later, but i needed some release and I wasn't going to get that from a sword. I craved the sense of control I felt when I held a bow in my hands instead of the recklessness that sword fighting brought.

It wasn't too long before I could hear Thor's heavy footsteps as he marched his way to my post.

"Rowan! Where have you been? You have acted so strangely this morning. First you disappear suddenly during breakfast and then you aren't at the training field ready for your practice. I had to search all over the nine realms in every nook and cranny before I found you here!" he bellowed at me as one of my arrows went whizzing past his head.

I sent an icy glare in his direction before firing off another arrow. " Maybe if you weren't so dull you would've thought about where I would have been a little bit more and you wouldn't have had to go wandering around like a bumbling idiot looking for me."

"That is completely beside the point! You're one of my dearest friends and it isn't like you to miss practice. In fact, you've never missed."

I sighed before lowering my bow. "I'm sorry, Thor. I had another dream last night. It was different though. It was about me. I don't really want to talk about the details. It just kind of freaked me out a little bit. I wanted to clear my head."

"I understand," he smiled, "you're allowed to miss practice you know. I just want you to let me know so I don't have to go all the way to Midgard searching for you!"

"I'll be sure to do that. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go speak to your brother." I said while playfully pushing him out of the way.

AN: So...this story is kind of my first attempt at putting any ideas down on paper. So I appreciate criticism, but I definitely like the constructive kind best! I want honest opinions so I can learn and become a better writer. Leave reviews...PM...doesn't matter. I think the more time I spend putting the ideas that I have scribbled in a notebook into words, the better I'll get! Thank you for reading this far, and once again, I would really appreciate reviews!


	4. Chapter 3

I do not own Thor or The Avengers

Once I had made it back to the palace, I headed straight to my room. If I was going to do anything right now, it was bathe. As I soaked in the golden tub, I tried to think about how I could act even semi normal around Loki today. I couldn't tell him about my dream! Not yet.

My dreams were always quick. I never got details just small snippets of the future and it was the same with last nights premonition. I only saw myself as a bride walking down the aisle of the grand hall. I looked up and saw Loki in his armor smiling down at me. All the other specifics were blurry. I also saw Loki in Germany as he terrorized the guests at some Midgardian ball. But I knew very well that my premonitions didn't always come true. They had only been wrong a couple of times before, but they did have the potential to be wrong. I could only hope that the first part would come true. I'd always had feelings for Loki and nothing felt more right than marrying my best friend.

Deciding I couldn't hide out in my room for forever, I got up and put on my warriors outfit that was accented with navy blue. I left my long, brown hair down and walked into the hall. Since it was still so early, I began to walk towards Loki's private library. I knew I was always welcome there. I entered the room and started the a fire in the chilly room. I immediately went to the section that Loki had placed just for me. It was filled with histories, Asgardian fairytales, books on magic, and of course, stories of war, battle, and strategy. I snatched the book of fairytales from the shelf and settled myself into a large armchair by the fire.

The door to my left that led to Loki's private chambers suddenly opened. I stood to see Loki entering the library.

"I should have known it was you in here. I heard the fire and came to investigate." he said with a small smile.

"Very responsible of you, my prince. We wouldn't want the library to burn down at the hands of your careless brother." I replied with a smirk on my face.

He laughed and grinned at me. "No we would not." He looked at me for a brief moment before speaking again. "Are you all right today? You departed so quickly from breakfast that I never had the chance to speak with you. And now here you are, in my library, instead of at the archery fields."

I sighed and looked away. I walked over to the large window seat and sat down on the warm cushion. This window held the best views of Asgard. I didn't want to answer, but I had to say something.

"It was just a dream I had last night that's all. No need to worry. I skipped out on sword practice with Thor and practiced archery instead."

He frowned and walked over to the window to sit across from me. "Well now I know somethings wrong. You never miss. You love your practices too much. Are you going to tell me what your dream was about? You've had bad premonitions before. What is it about this one that's got you all riled up?"

"I can't tell you, Loki. I suppose I can tell you one thing though. It was about me."

"Interesting. Now, why exactly can't you tell me?" he asked giving me a stern look. The type of look that makes you feel very small.

"I can't tell you! Not yet! It's going to completely change everything. I can't tell you. It has to happen all on its own. I'm sorry. I want to but I can't imagine things being different between the two of us." I could just imagine telling him and having his face contort with the thought of marrying me. When he has women like Sigyn begging for him he doesn't need to be eternally linked to a woman who will always be marching off to battle and trying to master basic defense spells. If this happened, he was going to be sure of it and do it all on his own. I wouldn't pressure him into this at all.

He sighed and grabbed my hand. Pulling me into a hug he whispered in my ear, " You are the person who matters to me the most. Nothing will change that." He then stood up, still holding my hand, and said, "Now, I don't know about you, but I'm absolutely starving to death. You ate so little at breakfast this morning so I know you must be starving. Come along, little one."

I playfully glared at him as he pulled me through the door of the library and looped my arm through his as we began to walk. "I'll have you know that I'm not that much younger than you! It isn't my fault that they save the best for last."

He feigned hurt and responded, "Ouch, Rowan. That truly hurts coming from you. It's a shame that by the time you came along all of the humor had already been given out to the rest of the nine realms. I bet your sister got the very last of it, however small that amount may have been."

"You take that back right now!"

"I could never do such a thing to poor Sif! It may be the only compliment I ever pay her!"

I looked up at him and we burst into hysterics. By the time we reached the dining room, however, we had recovered and took our seats to begin our afternoon meal.

AN: Okay. Here was another chapter. I like reviews. They help me. I don't want them just so satisfy some desire for praise, I honestly want to know where you want me to improve, but I can't do that unless you tell me. Thank you for reading!


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